a big lesson
it’d be impossible to catch up on the last few months on this blog, so i’m just going to come back bit by bit, detail by detail. first up: work.
suffice it to say that my first job out of college has been difficult. very difficult. i’ve had lots of concerns about the number of overtime hours i’m working, the distribution of the workload, salary expectations, and so on.
i’ve gone to my bosses, asking them to address various issues over the last few months with no success. at the beginning of this week, i was starting to see the end of the line and worrying about what decisions i would have to start making regarding my work, my relationships and my life.
but this morning, i woke up with some clarity. i had been talking with a friend last night, and he was making these overly complimentary comments about how i inspire him and such. and i realized i felt like i had lost some of what he was talking about.
i’m a hard worker, and i take pride in my work and in my company. therefore, i’ve let people walk all over me and assume i’m always going to do what they want me to do. and instead of continuing to grow frustrated and trying to overstretch myself and gong insane, i need to set my own limits because any business will squeeze every last bit of productivity out of me.
if i set my own limits, i can lessen my own frustration and stop trying to reach beyond my capabilities. if the business suffers for it (financially or otherwise), they will be forced to deal with the problems at hand. i’m not in a position to solve every problem, so i need to stop trying to.
i love what i do. i love design, and i love journalism. i just have to get used to the way businesses work. i won’t let some bad management chase me away this office, this city and everything i love in it. if i leave and go somewhere else, odds are, i’d find myself in a similar situation all over again because i’d be letting them take advantage of me in an attempt to prove my worth. i have the ability to change some of this through my own behavior.
i know this seems like some sort of weird empowerment speech, but i think it’s one of the biggest lessons i’ve learned since leaving school and starting my “real life.”
i promise another update soon. and some good quotes too. :)
love.
